reading back my blog posts..i realized how much i changed as a person...good or bad...im not sure about that.

Through this 2 whole sem of poly, i found a bunch of great frens and i found a new me. Im still quite introvert when im not close with someone..but instead of staying inside my shell now i speak up. Instead of waiting for people to approach me,i took the initiative first..whether or not i want to be recognized haha.

I hope i changed for the better...because i realized how selfish ive been all this while..how insensitive and ignorant i was. Ive met more people and know more characters...i used to live in this small circle of community. Im now more used to the big world...opening up more than i used to. It made me more mature in thinking and more open-minded.

At nearly 3am in the morning and the whole reflecting thingy im blabbing is because tmr is the D-day..results!1 and im damn scared....just typing to make me less anxious about it..but seems like butterflies in my stomach aint going away haha.

Its been so long since i blog....and truthfully i really have no time to blog...just that i kinda dont wanna type it out bcos some things are better left unsaid..haha

Honestly...this sem have been awful..its exhausting physically and mentally. Just that i try to live day by day as it is,smile and laugh to cover all those breakdowns.

I cried twice in sch and i hate myself for it...eventho people didnt know about it. I have this thing about keeping things to myself and i know too much of it aint good,haha...so during those times where im at the edge, tears just fall down..and up came the puffy eyes~~ hahahahaha

practically its just a stressful and bad sem...whoever said poly life is easy..i'll hack you up. The amount of pressure i faced everyday is just too outstanding. Doing quiz every single day and its counted..idek.

well i hope i could get a 3.0 for GPA at least....i cant afford lesser than that.

And i hate that everytime i blog its about poly life lol....

Imma study hard and score as good as i can for sem exam and score for it insyaAllah...:)

Back from the trip yesterday! Safely alhamdulillah. So the trip was uber short,haha. I need a week trip b4 im satisfied >.<.. This is gonna be along post~~

1st Day:

Set off the bus at 8am and off we goto the Egg

Tech Industry...basically thats the factory where all the eggs are manufactured into hard boiled eggs,pasteurised eggs and so forth..so food chem lolol.

After spending abt an hour there,we went to Tuas Checkpoint(stupid thumbprint wont work -_-) and off to johor checkpoint. Hadlunch arnd 1pm and it sucked bcos we were segregrated into muslims and non-muslims..i wanted to eat with all my classmates :(. Since its two group consisting of 80 people,they told us its hard to get a halal place where they can accomadate us. The food was so-so...and its not 8 course meal its 8 dishes meal lol.

After lunch back to our journey to sightseeing at malacca if im not wrong. We went to this place where all the old buildings are conserved and went a bit of a shopping. Luckily i found a mosque there,i was so happy you dont even know cos i was worried i cant find a place to pray. My classmates waited for me outside while i prayed,im thankful at how understanding they are:))heartss..

After 45mins there,we continued our journey to Shah Alam after dinner for a night stay at Concorde hotel. The hotel was super nice! we spent our night playing ugly dolls,watching tv and talking(loudly).

2nd Day:

We went to take pictures near KLCC there befor going to High5 bread town to know more abt the bread industry,went to Thai cuisine restaurant for lunch. We ate together!!! was so happy heheh. after lunch we went to Beryl's choc factory..it was fun but time does not permit and we were really out of itinerary but i managed to but a bottle of white choc for my fam:) After that we're off to cameron highlands!! It was a freaking long ride,slept all my way thru mostly. And did i mentioned,in the bus we watched Cinderella stepsisters lol and some movies. It was dark when we finally "climbing" up to cameron and the windy roads were not obvious so i didnt felt dizzy or watsoever. funny incident, both busses were halted bcos a senor wanted to pee..lol.

At last reached cameron arnd 1030pm and yay got internet!! we played cards and used my laptop. Me and tassha talked until 2+am haha. it was awesome:))

3rd Day:

After breakfast,we went to BOH tea plantation. We took a small "Bas Sekolah" lol it was so squeezy and the bus ride was bumpy as the roads are super narrow. We saw how tea bags are made and manufactured. Took some pics with the awesome scenery behind us. Bought tea bags~~

We went to cactus/flower farm? hhaha.yeah just took some pics since we cant bring cactus back to SG,bee farm too where we got pissed off by these bunch of itchy bitchy seniors who called us retards just because we shouted in fear of bees >:(. Strawberry farm next but it was a failure,there's no strawberries to pluck so we went to another strawberry farm but guess wat that one also,but at least we get to touch and bought some starwberries home. And so because w e got some time,we went to pasar malam at Tanah Rata. bought snacks and more strawberries. Prayed at Cameron Highland Mosque before heading off to eat dinner at KFC and back to hotel to rest.Last night in cameron and we went to lobby to play cards and use the free wifii>.<.. as usual talked with tassha b4 falling asleep^__^.

4th Day:

eating strawberry keke,the scenery from our hotel.
drying strawberries to bring back home

Time to leave cameron T.T..i was sad because its not enough,wanted moooreee. We set off the old reaally windy road back to muar to visit the mushroom farm. Slept all my way thru back to SG~~~

The trip was quite short,i miss cameron highlands already~~~had so much fun with the girls hehehe..now im in SG which means....do ur PROJECTS!!!.....siaaannnz

pics credit to natassha~~ :))

Heellloooo bloooogg!!!

Tmr i'll be leaving singapore fr a 4d3n trip to malaysia. This will be the first time i'll be going with some of my A2 classmates for a study trip. Pretty excited but i just hope everything goes out smoothly tmr and i go and come back safely :)

Will be going to the plantations and factories in cameron highland to study how the food industry works...i shall anticipate that hehe.

I'll be doing my project also during my stay there..hahah no choice okay or else i'll rush thru everything and it'll make me bonkers~~

So yeah,will be back thursday nite...till then~~ :))

Forever dead blog is reviving..lol

Term Tests OVEEERRRR.....i is officially a happy girl rite now i cant even..hahahahah.

altho i noe i screwed some of the papers..../dies. But...put that aside,im done with the "all-day study week". Seriously dread it. Its like i only had 4-5 hrs of sleep daily and sometimes even lesser. I can enjoy now and sleep~~

The year is coming to an end and i didnt even realise that..haha. I didnt improve much and yeah..quite disappointed in myself. No brooding over things...shall just continue with how i am and slowly improve myself:)

Going to malaysia trip next week,im quite excited but as u noe the higher the expectation the more disappointment >.<..

Hoping for the best~~

Yesterday was really crazy for me...

It started with a bad day of me not being able to remember the first topic and the mistake of me only focussing more on topic 2 which only one question came out. I was really disappointed...when i met with tudung gang,i broke down and cried. Really..i thought i was stronger. It was only a quiz. But thinking back..i broke down because the inside me cant take it anymore...and letting it out was just the way.

But i started to become happy again after tudung gang comforted me and my classmates were worried and waited for me when they noticed i was missing. Thanks u guys:)

My eyes were puffy all along hahaha....and i had the greatest laugh meeting nir,nadia,nabihah and ficky...really ur presence just filled my day.

Friends are really the people u need in ur life..without them you would feel lost and lonely..thank you~

things havent been working out well this week...and the news of my dear fren's father passed away...it adds to it.



It was shocking to me..to imagine in her situation i cant even..im speechless. Munirah, u are very strong dear. How u managed to smile and hold it in,i am proud of you. When you let it out and cry, i felt relieved and sad at the same time because letting it out is better than keeping it inside of you but seeing you cry hurts me deep inside. In some way i felt useless that i couldnt do anything to help you but just being there infront of you yesterday.



I hope you'll continue being strong and continue life as usual..we will always love you and be by your side.....

Hey~~

So first week of school...how was it? Oh "awesomely" great. I didnt know 2nd sem was this hard..im really struggling. And its not helping that im like always in holiday mood.

2 assigned projects this week..2 more projects comin my way nxt wk.

Homeoworks are piling up..and i have to force myself to adapt to the busy lifestyle again..haish.

well,enough of me whining of sch... On a side note,happy to meet my fellow classmates who always "shower" me with their endless love >.<..hahah. And meeting tudung gang:)

I hope i'll survive this sem..i needa get good grades,nope super good grades../dies. eh..no! Insyaallah :)

Sometimes wished are unfulfilled..hopes are dashed, but life still moves on albeit all these happenings.

Things dont always go your way...dreams are shattered, however you still need to force a positive thinking inside of you.

Mistakes can become misunderstandings....doubts can be harmful....

The world does not revolve only around you... things may be awful and emotions may go wild .

Just remember...there's Him...and also somehow somewhere there is at least a person who cares about you and also needs you during that phase.

These things happen...and i hope i'll be able to continue to contain myself well. Im not matured at a young age for nothing. Being responsible and a "2nd mum" since 11yrs old is no mean feat.

I'll start thinking about others before thinking about myself bcoz in this world of over 6 billion people, a lot more have experienced worst. I just experienced a tiny weeny bit of life.

Live life...:)

p/s: i dunno wat im babbling..heh

hmm............mayb its just a test for me to keep on working hard. Life aint that easy.

its just tat i cant help but be soo disappointed at myself when i see my results. i know i can do better than tat...i know. Tats why its even harder that i found myself to be scoring so badly.

Crying wont help,wats done cant be undone..............i knew it,when i have no confidence things will turn out otherwise.

Its just sad.....T.T...